Couple+How Long Have We Been Together? How to Count Your Days
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Subtract your start date from today to get the number of full days that have passed. Add one if you count the start date itself as day 1, which is how most couples count it. From 14 March 2022 to 15 September 2026 is 1,646 days elapsed, or day 1,647 if the first day counts. The two methods always differ by exactly one, so agree on one and use it everywhere. A love counter app does the sum every day, so nobody has to work it out again.
“How long have we been together?” sounds like it has one answer. Ask two calculators and you can get two numbers, a day apart. Ask your partner and you might get a third, because they were counting from a different date.
None of this is hard. It is just three decisions that are easy to make without noticing: which date you start from, whether that date counts as a day, and how you add it up. Make them once, deliberately, and the number stops moving.
Step 1: pick the start date
There is no official date a relationship begins. Couples count from:
- The day you met. Easy to remember if it was a specific event. Harder if you knew each other for months first.
- Your first date. The most common choice, and usually the one people mean when they say “how long have you been together”.
- The day you became official. The day one of you asked, or the day you agreed you were exclusive.
- Your wedding day. Usually kept for the anniversary itself, with a separate start date for the day count.
The right one is the one you both agree on. If you cannot agree, keep both: one for the counter, one for the anniversary. What does not work is quietly counting from different dates and discovering it on day 500.
Step 2: decide whether day one counts
This is where the one-day disagreements come from.
Counting days elapsed. Subtract the start date from today. On the day you got together the answer is 0, and a full day later it is 1. This is what date calculators, spreadsheets and most programming languages return.
Counting the day you are on. The start date is day 1. On the day you got together you are on day 1, and the next day is day 2. This is how most couples talk, and how most people count a streak.
The second number is always the first number plus one. Here is the same couple counted both ways:
| Start date | Today | Days elapsed | Day you are on |
|---|---|---|---|
| 14 March 2022 | 14 March 2022 | 0 | 1 |
| 14 March 2022 | 15 March 2022 | 1 | 2 |
| 14 March 2022 | 15 September 2026 | 1,646 | 1,647 |
If you want to announce “our 1,000th day”, the second way is usually what you mean. Pick it, write it down, and use it everywhere.
Step 3: add it up
By hand
Counting by hand is error-prone across years, because months have different lengths and every fourth February has 29 days. If you have to, count in blocks:
- Count the full years. Each is 365 days, or 366 if it contains a 29 February.
- Count the full months after that, using each month’s real length.
- Count the days left over.
From 14 March 2022 to 15 September 2026: four full years to 14 March 2026 is 1,461 days, because 2024 contains a 29 February. From 14 March 2026 to 14 September 2026 is 184 days. One more day to 15 September makes 1,646 days elapsed.
In a spreadsheet
This is the fastest reliable method if you do not want an app. With your start date in cell A1:
=TODAY()-A1returns the days elapsed.=TODAY()-A1+1returns the day you are on.=DATEDIF(A1,TODAY(),"y")returns full years together.=DATEDIF(A1,TODAY(),"ym")returns the months left over after those years.=DATEDIF(A1,TODAY(),"md")returns the days left over after those months.
The last three together give you “4 years, 6 months and 1 day”, which is often the friendlier way to say it.
With a love counter app
A love counter keeps the sum running for you. You set the start date once and the app shows the current number every time you open it. A good one also shows the number where you will actually see it, on your home screen, and shows the same count to both of you. See days-together widgets for how the home screen version works.
Milestones worth knowing
Round numbers of days fall on dates nobody would guess, which is half the fun. Work them out once and put them in a calendar.
- To find day N when the start date is day 1: add N − 1 days to the start date.
- To find the date N full days after the start date: add N days.
For a couple who got together on 14 March 2022, counting the first day as day 1:
| Milestone | Date |
|---|---|
| Day 100 | 21 June 2022 |
| Day 365 | 13 March 2023 |
| Day 500 | 26 July 2023 |
| Day 1,000 | 7 December 2024 |
| Day 1,500 | 21 April 2026 |
| Day 2,000 | 3 September 2027 |
Notice that day 365 is not the anniversary. The first anniversary, 14 March 2023, is day 366 on this count, because the start date used up a day. It is the clearest example of why the counting method matters.
If you track milestones and anniversaries both, the guide to not forgetting anniversaries covers how to keep them somewhere you both see. If you celebrate each month as well, the monthsary guide covers the awkward case of starting on the 29th, 30th or 31st.
Why the number disagrees between phones
Three causes cover almost every case:
- Different counting method. One of you counts the first day and the other does not. The numbers differ by exactly one, every day.
- Different start date. The difference is larger and does not change.
- Different time zones. For part of the day, one phone has already moved to tomorrow. This is common for long-distance couples and fixes itself a few hours later.
Where Couple+ fits
Couple+ is a love counter for two. You pick the start date once, and both of you see the same count from the same date, in the app and in a home screen widget. The counter sits alongside a shared diary, a couple calendar with countdowns to your milestones, and a daily question, so the number you are counting has something written next to it.
It is free to download on iPhone and Android, and counting your days together costs nothing.